Well crap... Bad news.

Everything is terrible. To the few of you who actually cared about Barako the Pirate and was looking forward to it's development, I'm sorry but it's dead. Long story short, I lost the hard drive which the game was on. 

Also my tablet is busted for unknown reasons, so I drew with my mouse. Hope you enjoy my crappy drawing of Barako, Vincenzo and Jim.

Okay, so what actually happened? Gonna overshare and tell you guys about myself, cause I am pissed off, I'm anxious as hell, and I need let off some steam. Everything was in that hard drive.  My game ideas, my games I've created, my diary, my photos, the artwork I drew, both concept art for the Eye of Vyrius, Barako the Pirate, other games. Not to mention the private pornographic artwork and stories I wrote, I have some pretty bizzare sexual fetishes which I'd rather not people to know about. And to top it all of it is probably in the hands of some asshole who was the one who stole my hard drive, and he/she is probably going through it right now. It freaks me out and I'm sorry if kids read this, just in case you don't know what porn is, don't look up it up, okay? Adult stuff man, you'll get in trouble with your parents.

Anyway, about myself. I've been diagnosed with paranoid schizophrenia. I've been in and out of the psyche hospital a lot, and have committed myself 4 times to the hospital, while involuntarily committed 2 times to the hospital, making a total of 6 stays. And while I am paranoid, I have very, very good reasons to be suspicious of people around me. Don't wanna give any more details other than that, cause I don't wanna get people close to me and people who were close to me in trouble.

While I am very, very tempted to tell my life's story, specifically the last 7 years of being dicked around by the Australian mental health care system, I won't. But what I will tell you is what happened to the hard drive.

Okay, I took my hard drive to the psyche ward in another town from where I live. Why? I won't tell why to not incriminate anyone, but it was for a good reason I assure you, I wanted to protect it. I was having a anxiety attack then and just wanted to have the hospital take a look at me. I was having trouble speaking, felt weak and tired and my throat was really, really sore. But then I was commited to the psyche ward again. Tricked into it, they took me to a different hospital, while I was out of it.  Also have the nerve of saying it was voluntary on the discharge form, when it wasn't. Gave them all my stuff, including the hard drive, my belt, phone charger (Yes I had a phone charger, my phone was running out of juice, needed to charge it somewhere.) Stayed there 2-3 days.  Then some fat ass gave me some drugs, diazapan or something which must've done something to my mind, cause when they discharged me to transfer me to my hometown's hospital, I didn't notice that they didn't show me my hard drive before I entered the ambulance. They showed me my wallet, money and keys sure, but not the hard drive, not the phone charger, and not my belt.

So the first psyche ward I was in lost my hard drive. I don't know if they did it on purpose, or because they are just crap at their job, but they did lose it.  And every interview I did with them I talked endlessly about it so they'd know about it for sure.

 If the hard drive isn't in the list of belongings I had, I'll know it's the doctor or nurse who took them and I will find their names and I will sue them.  Got a lot of money in the bank, and I'll probably be able to afford a good lawyer.  And if it is on the list of belongings, I'll admit I'll be a little less angry, theft happens, although I'll still probably sue the hospital. I mean, why was the hard drive stolen, but not the money? Or my car or house keys?

Pissed off.  Lol so that's my story. Game's dead.  Unless I get my hard drive back, I've lost all motivation to continue.  Gonna start work on a new game. Maybe I'll come back to it.  Although maybe I won't.

It's depressing. Barako the Pirate was the game/comic I came up with before I was first admitted to hospital.

I've always been self conscious about my art. Ever since the art class at college, when I learned I wasn't that great at art, I kinda just gave up. I was like wow, am I really that bad? I was 17-18 back then, so for like 12 years I just kinda gave up on art.  

That is until I started to draw again when I was 30.  Played a game called Passpartout: The Starving Artist, totally got freaking addicted to drawing again. Got a tablet, learned how to use Medibang and became really really addicted to it, like just drawing non stop constantly. While at work I just thought constantly of the crazy shit I was gonna draw next. Went kinda crazy for like a month, drawing and drawing and drawing.  Then I dunno why. Just started to draw pirates. Loads of pirates. Loads of them. Then came up with the story and characters of Barako the Pirate, drawing all the characters and writing the story outline.

Course, because I was so goddamn excited about drawing again, I forgot to sleep. And then, I started to feel very, very disassociated, tired and weird.  Then I started to hallucinate.  I remember looking at the mirror.  I looked like a pirate.  Looked completely different, like a more badass version of myself.  Then I started hallucinating drawings of poorly drawn badass pirates. Then I began to hear awesome pirate music from somewhere.

And yeah, realising something was wrong I went to hospital.

It's special to me this game. I feel like it has the potential to be great and is by far the best idea for a game I have. Sure, the comic sucked, (yes there's a comic but it sucked so bad I deleted it in shame, not a comic artist) but the game could be great. And it's sad.  All the concept art, all the sprites I made, all gone.

Always make backups.